Hello people of the internet, I’m Ross and I’ve somehow managed to scrape some time together in order to write some bollocks for you. It’s currently 6am and I’ve just finished designing notebooks and pens! Yes, we’ll actually have our own notebooks and pens 😳 more on that another time. As for now, let’s talk some shit.
Ramble and stuff
Had I wrote this email a couple of days ago it probably would’ve been a lot more miserable as I was feeling pretty shit. Why was I feeling a bit shit? Umm… I donno… I think sometimes I just get drained and then I feel a bit done.
I think owning your own business also doesn’t help sometimes as every single time I go up the unit, I technically do so because I WANT to, not because I’m contractually obliged to go. Unlike with Royal Mail, I HAD to go in and fulfil my contracted hours, with Teddy Eva Scents, no one is “technically” making me go in, so that mentally puts me in a different position. It makes me feel like I’m picking the unit over the family.
Of course, that’s not technically true as if I just went “Ha! Fuck it! Never going up the unit again!” then I dare say the business wouldn’t last very long. But I’m just saying how it FEELS, rather than how it technically is.
The kids never really like me going because they don’t fully understand the concept of work and how it’s a needed thing. Isabelle at times probably thinks I’m just abandoning her for no reason. We do try to explain it to her, but I’m not sure how much all of it sinks in. I 100% know I’m not alone in this, and I dare say a LOT of you battle with this yourselves.
You’re trying to do your best to provide for your family, and at the same time you almost feel guilty for doing so.
I do try my best to balance it all. At the moment, I’m usually up the unit from 9ish until 12/1. So 4 hours isn’t exactly a long working day - especially when you compare it to what I was doing a year ago going up at 4/5/6am until 3/4 at times.
I’m incredibly thankful that we have Jenny, Caroline and Kathryn working up the unit so that I’m able to even do these hours. If you have ordered from us on this recent restock, then the chances of your order being packed by one of those three is VERY high. The way the business is now, I almost only pack orders when they’re for TikToks because there’s just so much other stuff to do.
Don’t get me wrong, doing 4 hours up the unit usually means I have the odd bit of laptop work and shizzle to do on my phone when I get home. But at least I’m home instead so that’s better, right?
Ah sometimes it’s worse as I feel bad for having to do stuff. But I am trying my best to leave things that can be left. Rachel’s also helping to try and take some of the workload off, so you might get email replies from her too. I think she was surprised by the number of emails that came through after the restock 😂
It’s just hard having a brain that constantly wants to do stuff, mixed with a business that constantly needs stuff doing.
Carrying the weight of the business
Also, I think sometimes I carry a lot of weight on my shoulders over all of this, and it’s perhaps a weight that’s only getting heavier.
I do feel like all of the business is on me.
I know I’m not the only one involved in it, and everyone does their thing, but I think I absorb 99% of the pressure. If the business was to fail, then it’s totally on me.
God knows how it’ll feel come the end of the year when Rachel quits and she’s also taking her wage via the business too. Then I’ll really be shitting it as if the business fails, then both me and Rachel are financially a bit fucked.
Sometimes I like the pressure
If I’m honest, sometimes I do like the pressure. I like going “Everyone climb on, I got this” and being the one to carry the flag. I try to do my best by everyone involved in the business. Like Kathryn started with us on Monday and I 100% still remember my first week with Royal Mail and how I was completely overwhelmed and wanted to quit. So she can take Friday off - paid, obvs 😂 - just to help process the new start and not feel like it’s too much.
Like I’m not a “boss” that’s like “Ha! Here’s your pennies for working for me and all this money is MINE!”
I like giving random bonuses and all that jazz. Mainly because it’s really cool. Like I can email payroll when doing the pay run and give the hours and all that and then put “Super cool bonus” or “shits and giggles bonus” or “saving Ross when the car died” bonus and that literally gets printed on the payslip 😂
They’re probably sat there on the other end going “who the fuck is this guy?” but I’m not exactly what you would call “super professional” with some stuff.
But yeah…
Umm… not sure what else I was going to say to be honest.
I’ve now closed the website while we get the orders done. Although closing it is mainly down to the fact that our end of financial year is on the 28th of Feb, so I wanna make sure I have a clear separation with stuff.
We will try and open back up in a week or so… I don’t know. Totally depends how long it takes us to get the rest of the orders done, and whether we start on making Mother’s Day boxes, or whether we start on the subscription boxes. Then we’ll probably have an actual restock sometime in late March 🤔 like… if I had to guess then maybe the next restock will be the 25th of March. But who knows.
We’ll see I guess.
Anyway…
Thank you for reading. Not sure what you got from this but thank you for reading all the way down to this point.
Much love,
Ross & Rachel x
Would love a mother's Day box for my mum,she's obsessed with wax melts!